20 Stoned Epiphanies for 4/20

1. ‘ We should make brownies.
2. ‘ When my cat meows at the walls, I have a feeling she is talking to ghosts.
3. ‘ The phone is not ringing.
4. ‘ It's easy to win sweepstakes if you are committed to playing a lot of them.
5. ‘ We really should make brownies.
6. ‘ So much funny stuff happens when we're high, if we wrote it all down, we could have the next million dollar stoner comedy, easy!
7. ‘ I remembered what we were talking about before! Her name was Melinda Doolittle.
8. ‘ Snoop Dogg would respect me because of how hard I can rip a bong.
9. ‘ There are different levels of epiphanies.
10. ‘ Not pot brownies, we should make regular brownies to eat since we're already high.
11. ‘ It's almost 2015 – the year in Back to the Future II where they had hover boards and flying cars, but I don't feel like we are close enough to having those as an affordable reality in six years . And it bums me out. Because I'm really looking forward to hover boards.
12. ‘ In Asia, people spit in the street a lot, and Americans think it's weird. I bet the thing Americans do that Asians think is weird is not spit in the street a lot.
13. ‘ I haven't been outside in three days.
14. ‘ I once had brownies with little Snickers bars in them. We should make those kind of brownies.
15. ‘ The guys who wrote the “Chris Brown should get his ass kicked” song are balls out.
16. ‘ Today is only Monday!
17. ‘ We should make a time capsule.
18. ‘ The craziest thing in the world is a non-reversing mirror.
19. ‘ There are infinity different kinds of pizza.
20. ‘ Million dollar idea: Brownie Pizza.