By: Get Him To The Greek
Supertight Music Video
Rose Byrne
Video footage of a scientist acting dumber than you would.
Russia announced plans to patrol the Gulf of Mexico with long range bomber flights, its latest international provocation taking us all a little bit closer to World War III. What most people don’t realize, however, is how many times we’ve come close before. Funny Or Die News presents the following Fact Blast of our armageddon Missed Connections:
ARE MACGYVER AND QUANTUM LEAP ACTUALLY THE SAME SHOW? YES. If you were around in the 80 ‘s and watching TV or haven ‘t been living under a very large rock for the past 30 years, you know the show MacGyver, the tale of top secret government contractor Angus MacGyver fighting bad guys using duct tape, paper clips, and science. And if you were around in the 80 ‘s watching TV and not living under a rock, you were probably around in the 90 ‘s watching TV and not living under a rock, so you know the show Quantum Leap, the tale of Dr. Sam Beckett and his involuntary travels through time, leaping into different lives and setting things straight before leaping to the next life. You know QUANTUM LEAP. If you don ‘t know what I ‘m talking about, then stop watching RIGHT now, and get back under your giant rock! You subhuman… For the rest of you ‘ You know MacGyver. You know Quantum Leap. But did you know that they are actually the SAME SHOW and every episode of MacGyver is actually one episode of Quantum Leap!? Dr. Sam Beckett leaped into Angus MacGyver in the first episode, and controlled him for 7 great seasons! Crazy, right? Or is it? Coincidence. People say coincidence is a funny thing. If that ‘s true I ‘m about to tell you some funny things. Both Sam Beckett and Angus MacGyver have a fear of heights? Coincidence? Or is their SHARED fear of heights really just Sam ‘s fear of heights? Both Sam Beckett and Angus MacGyver play the guitar. Coincidence, or is Sam putting on an act like he did when he performed at Carnegie hall as a musical child prodigy? Am I the only one seeing the strings in this theory? Both Sam Beckett and Angus MacGyver speak many languages. Coincidence, or “coincidencia ‘? It doesn ‘t really matter, because Sam would understand either way. Both Sam Beckett and Angus MacGyver know all kinds of martial arts like Karate, Judo, and Taekwondo. Coincidence? Maybe ‘ but if you aren ‘t starting to smell something fishy here, you might be waxing off way too much. Still just funny coincidences? Need more proof? Setting things straight. MacGyver is always doing things to save lives, change lives, and just kind of help people out. In the course of 7 great seasons, he helps just about everyone possible- he helps his TERRIBLE best friend Jack Dalton, his boss Pete Thorton, his NOT girlfriend Penny Parker, deaf children, inner city youth, delinquents in the woods, a Russian girl, endangered species, and really, well… everyone he meets. He even saves Blossom and Cuba Gooding Jr.. What a saint! Saving and changing all these lives ‘ who does that sound like? RIGHT! Dr. Sam Beckett. Helping people out, helping people set things straight, sounds like Dr. Sam Beckett doing everything he can to “set things straight ‘ so that he can leap on to the next life. And how does MacGyver end? How do we wrap up 7 great seasons? MacGyver discovers he has a college age son, Sean Angus Malloy- a.k.a. Sam, it spells it out, and MacGyver decides that they have a lot catching up to do, retires from the Phoenix Foundation, and they ride off into the sunset on motorcycles… THE PERFECT TIME FOR Dr. SAM BECKETT LEAP OUT OF MACGYVER ‘S LIFE AND INTO ANOTHER! And if you can ‘t see the truth now, the truth that for 7 great seasons Angus MacGyver was actually Dr. Sam Beckett, maybe you should go find a giant rock to live under, because you don ‘t have to have a genius IQ of 267 or a super computer from the future named Ziggy to figure this out. You just need backwoods common sense and some duct tape ‘ http://chuckmccarthy.com
Marshall & James are cousins and very distant relatives of the Kennedys, so distant they’ve never been considered part of the family. When they fail to get a job or internship after their 1st year of business school, the pair finds themselves wasting time at their summer home on The Cape. (Written by and starring James Coker and Marshall Stratton. Directed and edited by Shane Tilston. Shot by Arlen Konopaki.)
Did you see the couple who’s giving up Taco Bell until abortion is outlawed? Well, that’s NOTHIN’!
Remember that giant stone head from Mario Brothers who smashes people? There’s more to him than a crushing block of granite. Like bitterness. And anger-management issues.