By: TheMagicHour

| | | | | | |

Stephen Colbert Sticks It to Planned Parenthood Critics, Continues to be on Fire

Okay, so last week, we posted that clip of Stephen Colbert

, and deemed it Stephen Colbert being the best.
We were wrong.* Here is Stephen Colbert being the best. There's so much to like about this clip. First off, he's spot-on in his ripping of Jon Kyl, Fox and Friends, and the ridiculous claims being made about Planned Parenthood. Second, how often do you see Stephen Colbert break character? Never? I'm gonna go with never.
Enjoy. Then after enjoying, scroll down for more Colbert greatness.

How great was that?** Colbert breaking character is totally excusable when you’re saying some of the funniest things that a human being can say. In fact, it just ends up being endearing. Also endearing was what followed. Since that clip aired on Monday night, Colbert has taken to Twitter, continuing to rip on Kyl with the hashtag #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement. It’s been delightful.

Here’s a sampling of his handiwork.

  • Jon Kyl claims the craziest thing he’s ever done was that time he ate pancakes for dinner. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • Jon Kyl is the only person who can sneeze with his penis. He calls it a “sneenis.” #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • Jon Kyl can unhinge his jaw like a python to swallow small rodents whole. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • Jon Kyl destroyed love in 1973. All feelings since then have been but a shadow of the original concept. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • Jon Kyl actually prefers Hydrox to Oreos. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • Jon Kyl developed his own line of hair care products just so he could test them on bunnies. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • Jon Kyl’s torso is covered in superfluous nipples. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • Jon Kyl can, and will, deny that you’re a jolly good fellow. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • Jon Kyl was sent from the future to kill Sarah Conner. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • Jon Kyl is an accomplished nude hula dancer. He is not welcome in Hawaii. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • For the past ten years, Jon Kyl has been two children in a very convincing Jon Kyl suit. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • Jon Kyl calls the underside of his Senate seat: “The Booger Graveyard.” #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • Jon Kyl cheated on Sandra Bullock. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • Jon Kyl let a game-winning ground ball roll through his legs in Game 6 of the ’86 World Series. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • In 2009, Jon Kyl lost $380,000 wagering on dwarf tossing. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • Citing religious reasons, Jon Kyl refuses to utter the number 8. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • Jon Kyl murdered a caricaturist for drawing him with a basketball instead of a surfboard. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • Jon Kyl holds the Guinness World Record for “Largest Collection of Penis Enlargers.” #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement
  • Legally, Jon Kyl cannot be within 100 yards of Helen Mirren. #NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement

The guy’s on fire.

*Well, we weren’t wrong. Stephen Colbert’s always the best. These are the facts, people.
**Really effing great.

Similar Posts