Hands on a Car Competition: Part 1

Dear James Cameron, I get it. Your remake of ‘Fern Gully’ lost the Academy Award last year to your hot as fuck ex-wife. That’s a big blow to your ego, sure. And now, in some desperate attempt to remind us that you’re “cool” and “definitely a director” you’ve decided to re-release ‘Titanic’ in 3D… Granted, I will buy tix, because I’d like to reclaim some lost part of my youth, just like you! But the whole time I will be silently saying “Fuck you, Cam,” because this sucks. Just go make us Fern Gully 2, and stop re-releasing shit.