By: Jack Packard
6 Places with Free Air Conditioning
THE MALL
It might be part nostalgia for my teen-age years and part RAMPANT CONSUMERISM.
BUT I LOVE THE MALL.
The shops, the games, the cookies, the people watching, the cookies and that generic “Taco Place” restaurant.
Above all else I love the mall because it is climate controlled.
They have to blast the A/C so the unwashed teen-agers don’t drown in their own B.O. and to stave off decomposition in the elderly walkers and gawkers.
A/C Level: BRRRRRREAT(Like Great ‘.but colder)
Cost: Free (as long as you don’t buy anything)
Possible downside: Creepy old men undressing you in their ever slipping mind/constant cookie small turning you into a big fat fatty.
The Movie Theatre
Now I know what you thinking “A movie is Fucking expensive” ‘well FUCK YOU ‘.HOLD ON…I’ll fix it.