By: Brian Boone
Who Said It: Mitt Romney or Someone in the Insane Clown Posse?
Mitt Romney doesn’t understand why airplane windows don’t roll down. The Insane Clown Posse has mused in song about the mystery of magnets. Not knowing the widely known answers to things isn’t the only similarity between Mitt Romney and the ICP, as both are a little bit crazy and crude, both are a little bit uninformed, and both are from Michigan and have cult-like followings (though the ICP, despite clown makeup and songs about mass murder, is far more likeable). Can you tell which of the following things were spoken by Romney, and which were by Violent J or Shaggy 2 Dope of the ICP?
1) “A giraffe is a miracle. It has a dinosaur-like neck. It’s yellow.”
2) “Pin the tail on the donkeys.”
3) “Well, science is…we don’t really…that’s like…ok.”
4) “Look, I probably love my family more than anybody here.”
5) “I believe in an America where millions of Americans believe in an America that’s the America millions of American believe in.”
6) “I like ice cream, cherry pie and lemonade.”
7) “When I was a kid, I never really missed money. We loved having no money.”
8) “I like those fancy raincoats.”
9) “Detroit’s not a touristy place. But what’re you gonna do about it? It’s a vast wasteland of poverty. That’s what Detroit is.”
10) “We’ve carved out our own niche. It is what it is. We’re proud. We’re happy. We’re satisfied.”
11) “I purchased a gun when I was a young man.”
12) “Why step back at all? We have to keep banging the pots and pans.”
13) “I want to taste this by the way. Let me show you how it’s done. You take this with your fork and you put it in. That’s good.”
14) “I’m not proud of it. I told you all about it, and you applauded.”
15) “Church doesn’t have to pay taxes? Wow! Maybe we should open a church! I didn’t even know that!”
Answers:
1) ICP (The Guardian)
2) Romney, regarding where to “pin blame”
3) ICP (The Guardian)
4) ICP (“Homies”)
5) Romney
6) ICP (“Rainbows and Stuff”)
7) ICP (Violent J’s memoir, Behind the Paint)
8) Romney, referring to some NASCAR spectators’ ponchos
9) ICP (LA Weekly)
10) ICP
11) Romney, trying to make people think he’s a hunter
12) ICP (Oakland Press)
13) Romney, at that secretly taped fundraiser, on how a fork works
14) ICP (“Down With the Clown,” regarding eating a dead body)
15) ICP (LA Weekly)
