By: News

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We Want To Have A Quick Chat With Whoever Installed The New Sprinklers At Auschwitz

Okay, y'all. Let ‘s play a little word association game. You ‘re going to read two words and then decide if the connotation between them is good, bad or horrifyingly bad. Got it? Cool! Let ‘s begin!

Child+ Scissors= ??
Answer: Bad!

Rain + Garden = ??
Answer: Good!

Showers + Auschwitz = ??
Answer: Horrifyingly bad!


How ‘d you do on that test? You probably aced it! Unless you ‘re the groundkeepers at Auschwitz, in which case not only did you not recognize that ‘showers” and ‘Auschwitz” have a horrible connotation but decided to install new ones on the former concentration camp for visitors to cool off. In which case, please remain for the rest of this article so we can clear some things up. Everyone else can go.

Hey! Thanks for hanging around. So looking over your test, it seems like you might not understand exactly what went down historically with the showers at Auschwitz. No, let me rephrase that. You do know, but you must have spaced out when you put up a misting sprinkler system around the former Nazi concentration camp. For some people I would maybe let that slide, but I ‘m going to be a little bit tougher on you than most because you guys run the historical site where 1.1 million people were murdered, a majority of whom were killed by ‘showers” that where actually gas chambers.

Now, I know it ‘s super hot in Germany right now. But considering that hundreds of thousands of people were burned alive on the grounds you currently work on, complaining about the heat doesn ‘t seem 100% appropriate. Hand out ice water or popsicles, but whatever you do, do not complain about how burning hot it is. That is a bad thing to do.

Lastly, officials who manage the worst and most horrific concentration camp this world has ever known, we get that the misters don ‘t look like the showers, but people are going to be sensitive when they visit Auschwitz. They already have the Holocaust on the brain, and whatever you can do to comfort them and not insinuate you ‘ve installed something that killed their ancestors is probably best.

Now, I ‘m not mad, I just expect more from you guys and I know you can do better. So get going, scallywags and don ‘t be late for tomorrows lesson on why you shouldn ‘t hold a feminist retreat at an old plantation.

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