The Full List Of Demands For Future Republican Debates

Following the last GOP presidential debate, advisers from at least 11 Republican campaigns met to create a list of demands for upcoming debates to gain greater control against what they saw as political bias and arbitrary rules.

• The undercard debate will shed this condescending moniker and instead be referred to as the ‘GOP Babies” debate.
• We get to talk about Hillary ‘s emails now.
• Each candidate must perform the Planned Parenthood videos as an interpretive dance.
• Everybody gets to enter the stage on a Hoverboard 360 balance board, one at a time, to individual theme music.
• Every following debate will start with the candidates bowing to a solid gold statue of Ronald Reagan.
• Every question for Mike Huckabee will be, ‘What ‘s it like being such a big boy?”
• If he feels like he ‘s being slighted by the other candidates, Jeb is allowed to eat his podium.
• Finally, TWO Trumps.
• Rubio and Jeb must refer to Florida as ‘my garbage state.”
• Huckabee finally allowed to dress in his precious Mrs. Doubtfire costume.