By: Jason Flowers
It ‘s our sincere belief that this week ‘s best tweets would have been RT ‘d in any era.
[18th Century Sext]
My dearest Caroline, please write by return of post to estimate what you may be wearing several days from now.
‘ Erren Michaels (@ErrenMichaels) November 22, 2015
Customs Official: Do you have anything to declare?
Southern Belle: No
‘ pat tobin (@tastefactory) October 1, 2015
grandpa: ur father changed after the war
me: somtimes emojis i never use appear in my frequently used page and i dont kno how they got there
‘ jomny sun (@jonnysun) November 24, 2015
Someone needs to stop that kid pic.twitter.com/29EidW5ku2
‘ Andy Ryan (@ItsAndyRyan) October 22, 2015
“Should I knock him out?”
“Ask your mother.”
(LL Cool J and his dad)
‘ Noah Garfinkel (@NoahGarfinkel) November 24, 2015
You think cocaine is cool? Well here's something that'll change your mind!
*cranks the Eagles greatest hits*
*my son starts crying*
‘ Josh Gondelman (@joshgondelman) November 24, 2015
Imagine being in Jethro Tull & the other guys say we aren’t gonna do flute in this one and you just have to sit there with your stupid flute
‘ ryan (crap( (@Karate_Horse) May 18, 2015
ME: [licking lips in anticipation] I'm nervous. I've never done a bungee jump before.
INSTRUCTOR: don't lick my lips again.
‘ Paul (@FrenulumBreve) August 19, 2015
Former NFL star running back Eddie George thinks he’ll be promoting his starring role as Billy Flynn in Broadway’s ‘Chicago’ ‘ until he gets ambushed by a football-hating intellectual community access show host (Dave Hill) with shocking revelations from the new tell-all book ‘NFL Confidential’ by Johnny Anonymous.