25 Better Names For The New Royal Baby

Today, the name of the newest addition to the Royal Family was revealed to the public: Charlotte Elizabeth Diana, a beautiful name that touchingly honors the memory of Princess Diana. However, the following names for the baby princess are all much, much better:

• Champ Number-One Queen Baby
• Princess Diana RIP Luv U 4Eva
• Scepter Jewels Crown Head VIIIIIII
• England Rose Candlewind
• Royal Baby (actual name)
• Kobe Shaq Iverson Mutombo
• The Queen Of Mean (make sure she grows up real mean)
• Charlotte In Charge
• Our Nation ‘s Little Cutie
• @QueenBaby
• New English Person
• Stacy
• Cute Meme
• Lucky Lil ‘ Bitch
• The Godfather Part Two
• Neil Girlstrong
• Kid Charlemagne (this is a Steely Dan reference and a reference to Charlemagne, the great 9th Century king. Additionally, it makes use of the song title ‘Kid Charlemagne” in service of pointing out that we ‘re discussing a royal infant. This is a great joke.)
• Stamps.com
• Mary Moonpuncher
• Just Girly Things ‘
• Emerson Lake Palmer
• charlotte@royalfamily.gov
• The Reckoning
• Sports
• Charles Grodin