By: Matt Dwyer
With all the controversy about Donald Trump we wanted to share some fun facts about The Donald that will illuminate him in a more fun light!!!
1.) Donald Trump loves Jelly Bellies! In fact, he always has a full bowl on his desk, but don ‘t grab some without asking or you ‘ll be fired!!!
2.) The Donald ‘s favorite movie of all time is Sleepless in Seattle. However, don ‘t talk during the movie in his private screening room, or you ‘ll be fired!!!!
3.) Did you know that Donald Trump once owned a team in the U.S. Football league called the New Jersey Generals? If you didn ‘t cheer for that team in Donald ‘s presence you weren ‘t fired because he wouldn ‘t have had time to do it. It was a horrible investment and the team and league quickly disintegrated faster than one can say, ‘You ‘re fired.”
- Donald hasn ‘t had a nocturnal dream in forty years. He doesn ‘t have to! He pays a gaggle of homeless people to act out dreams for him before he ships them off to Mexico.
4.) Some have accused Donald of having a God complex, but Mr. Trump prefers to think that God has a Trump Complex.
5.) Donald Trump is a self-made man. Granted he was born into a very wealthy family but he had to make his bed every morning, thus he interprets that to mean, ‘Self-Made Man.”
6) Did you know that each night when Donald goes to sleep he puts on his favorite pair of PJs and crawls into the wetness of a dark cave while wrapped in the wings of a thousand moths?
7.) Donald likes to stand fully naked in front of his penthouse window imagining that all the pedestrians below can feel the warmth of his manhood.
8.) Once purchased an entire town in Indiana and changed its name to Dickheadville for twenty-four hours.
9.) His middle name is Duck. Seriously.
- The Donald ‘s life goal is to purchase Canada, so he can turn it into the worlds largest Trump Casino.