By: Kady Ruth Ashcraft
The air is getting cooler and summer is winding down here on the East Coast. But don ‘t pack your shades away right yet, because you ‘ll need them when the coolest pope to grace our unholy land flies stateside this fall. The pope-mobile will be making pit stops in Washington DC, New York City, and Philadelphia.
Now it just so happens that Funny Or Die has an office in New York City that I am currently writing out of and our building is located conveniently within 15 minutes walking distance of St. Patrick ‘s Cathedral. We are also very close to Madison Square Garden, where he will be leading mass the next day.
As you can see from the above schedule generously provided by popefrancisvisit.com the Pope is free both evenings he is in town. What I ‘m trying to get at here is it looks like the Pope is more than available to shoot a cool video with us for our website. Imagine how many views that would get? A million? And you know what ‘s better than a million views? No not a billion views, but eternal life in Heaven.
Surely if we featured Pope Francis in a funny sketch video that highlighted not only his good nature but let him get some points across, like what we did with Barack Obama in Between Two Ferns, we would have a free pass into Heaven. It wouldn ‘t take long and could be filmed in a few takes. We ‘d take care of getting him fed and pay for his cab back to the hotel.
As for the plot, we ‘ll start brainstorming something fun and topical ‘ maybe the Pope getting excited for football season or drinking a pumpkin spice latte and loving it. We ‘ll figure that out, whatever. All we have to do now is get him here. I couldn ‘t find a direct email and he doesn ‘t allow DM ‘s on Twitter but then it hit me how to get him here.
I gathered all the Catholics in our New York office and had them all pray for the Pope to come make some content with us.
Now we wait. I do ask, however, if you are a Catholic and reading this, that you join us in prayer that Pope Francis visit out office to make a funny video. And if you believe in some other higher being, whoever or whatever they may be, it would mean the world if you reached out to them as well because as humans here on Earth, all we are united by is our love of sweet and holy online content.