By: Sean Casey
The NFL Playoff Team Each Presidential Candidate Represents
The 2016 election season has dominated headlines for months. Since there is barely anytime left for other news, you may or may not be aware that the NFL playoffs kick off on Saturday with the divisional round. Luckily, your political leanings and this year ‘s playoff teams share more similarities than you think.
Hillary voters should root for the Seattle Seahawks. They are both in pretty good shape to win this year, even though they definitely should have won last time around.
Trump supporters should root for the Carolina Panthers. They both have an early lead on the competition, are brash and loud, and will crumble before getting anywhere close to the prize.
The Arizona Cardinals. It wouldn ‘t be a huge surprise if they win, but I ‘ve never actually met one of their supporters. Do they exist?
The Houston Texans. Lone star state lunatics with no real chance.
No strangers to the competition but somehow way worse than previous versions, just like the New England Patriots.
The only goal is to not get laughed out of the room, just like the Cincinnati Bengals
Gotta Gotta be the Cheeseheads, also known as the Green Bay Packers. This is a fat joke.
The Minnesota Vikings: What are they still doing here? This will not end well.
The Kansas City Chiefs, destined to return to obscurity
The Pittsburgh Steelers. A reasonable, if painfully boring, choice.
The Denver Broncos. They might actually win, but who the fuck predicted it would happen this way?
The Washington Redskins. Out ‘ of ‘ touch, hate ‘-filled assholes!
See, everyone can enjoy the NFL. Let ‘s go Chiefs!