By: Jason Flowers
27 Goodest Tweets We Scrolled Past This Week #17

This week ‘s tweets are dumb, but they could definitely stand to be dumber.
Where are all the campaigns to lower awareness? There's some stuff we all know too much about.
‘ Josh Gondelman (@joshgondelman) January 9, 2016
It's gonna take a real idiot to write my autobiography.
‘ Amish PornStar ‘ (@AmishPornStar1) August 30, 2015
DENTIST: count backwards from 10 for me
NASA ANNOUNCER GUY: everywhere with this bullshit‘ Bob Vulfov (@bobvulfov) January 11, 2016
[dentist’s office, shirtless wearing gold chains and parachute pants] “Yes I floss regularly.”
‘ Creed (@novicefather) December 31, 2015
[speed date]
her: biggest regret? never going after my dreams. you?
me: not being a beiber fan sooner
her:
me:
her: damn thats a good one‘ EJ Gomez (@EJGomez) January 11, 2016
[plastic surgeon holds mirror up to my face]
ME: What happened!? I'm a monster!
DOCTOR: We had to postpone your surgery.‘ Tommytoughstuff (@Tommytoughstuff) January 15, 2016
So addicted to this show pic.twitter.com/f4CYirTJvW
‘ Nick Wiger (@nickwiger) January 9, 2016
If wrestling is fake why didn’t my nephew get up for ten minutes after I piledrivered him into a table?
‘ Bea_ker (@bea_ker) January 13, 2016
“Everything the light touches is ours,” I tell my son while opening the fridge.
‘ Grampa Fish Ape (@TheDeadfishSays) November 20, 2014
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