By: Ben Wietmarschen
2016: Baseball is declared #BestSport by the world ‘s leading website, Funny or Die.
Future: Nothing will ever change.
BASEBALL IS BEST!
Not only will the winner of this bracket walk away with the BEST SPORT moniker from now until the end of time, Funny Or Die will also be presenting a very real $100 check to the winner in a special ceremony after the tournament!
HOW TO VOTEClick on a matchup.Vote for the better sport.Leave a comment for why you think that sport is best. Vote in the first round to make sure your pick for Best Sport is heard. For further information on the rules for choosing the BEST SPORT, scroll below the bracket. 1 Basketball 72% 1 Basketball 73% 16 Bocci 28% 1 Basketball 75% 9 Jai Alai 67% 9 Jai Alai 27% 8 Squash 33% 1 Basketball 46% 5 Rugby 69% 5 Rugby 68% 12 Kickball 31% 5Rugby 24% 4 Swimming 54% 4 Swimming 32% 13 Fencing 46% Reverse 360 Slam Dunk Region 6 Bowling 30% 3 Cycling 46% 14 Rock Climbing 44% 14 Rock Climbing 54% 6 Bowling 70% 6 Bowling 59% 6 Bowling 56% 11 Bull Riding 41% 6 Bowling 54% 7 Weight Lifting 27% 10 M. Pentathalon 58% 10 Modern Pentathalon 73% 10 M. Pentathalon 30% 15 Badminton 48% 2 Track and Field 42% 2 Track and Field 52% 1 Baseball 72% 1 Baseball 52% 16 Darts 28% 1 Baseball 67% 8 Ultimate Frisbee 63% 8 Ultimate Frisbee 48% 5 Speed Skating 37% 1Baseball 60% 5 Skiing 75% 5 Skiing 39% 12 Diving 25% 13 Table Tennis 33% 1 Baseball 59%
FIRST ROUND ANALYSIS
During a weekend JAM PACKED with sports action, the Funny or Die Best Sport Tournament shined brighter than any of the other crap.
SECOND ROUND ANALYSISThe ‘Thick 32 ‘ has given way to the upcoming ‘Sports 16 ‘ in ultra dramatic fashion. We ‘re talking upsets like you ‘ve never even seen, tight scores like you can ‘t even imagine, and drama like you won ‘t even believe.
THIRD ROUND ANALYSISThe pretenders of Funny or Die ‘s #BestSport Tournament have fallen away and the big hitters are still breathing easy after three rounds of hardcore Sports Action! But Wait! There are still a few surprises left up this bracket ‘s sleeve because #BestSport tournaments, much like life, don ‘t follow no script.
FOURTH ROUND ANALYSISThe first truly game changing upset went down last night and the Sports world is still reeling. Baseball and Football skated through to the ‘Finalized 4 ‘ while Hockey edged Soccer and Bowling, yes BOWLING, took down Basketball, yes BASKETBALL!
FIFTH ROUND ANALYSISWe ‘ve made it to the end. The big one. What it ‘s all about: The FINALS, baby! After this coming Thursday, humanity will know ‘now and forever ‘what the #BestSport in the world actually is.
SIXTH ROUND ANALYSISBASEBALL Wins #BestSport Tournament! Watch The Giant Novelty Check Ceremony and get the final analysis. RULES his is a tournament to name the BEST sport. Not what’s the most popular or which has the best athletes or what’s the most fun to watch or which is most full of the toughest sons of bitches. To definitively find the undisputed BEST SPORT, the following rules have been followed. All of these rules were made up and are indisputable gospel truth.
The rule maker & bracket czar.
Ben & The Big Check
“Athletic move” does NOT include playing video games. Playing video games is not a sport, it’s playing video games. **ADDENDUM 2If the performance of a machine is tantamount to the performance of the individual or team, that activity is disqualified. NOTE: This doesn ‘t exclude sports using a machine, just that if the machine is more important than the human(s) operating it (e.g. In car racing the performance of the car is at least equal to the performance of the individual operating it, so it ‘s outta here. That ‘s right, NASCAR AND OTHER CAR RACING IS NOT A SPORT. I look forward to plenty of gasoline drenched hate mail.). ***ADDENDUM 3Horses and other animals are not machines, they are living things, thus their performance is considered as valid as a human ‘s and thus (again), horse/dog/other animals are included. ****ADDENDUM 4 If the original intent of the activity was not competition, then it is disqualified (That ‘s right, COMPETITIVE EATING IS NOT A SPORT. I look forward to plenty of buffalo sauce soaked hate mail). PLEASE NOTEIf a sport is not in the tournament, that doesn ‘t necessarily mean it is not actually a sport. It might just be a bullshit sport that is not in the top 64 (That ‘s right, COW CHIP THROWING IS A SPORT BUT IT ‘S NOT TOP 64. I look forward to plenty of hate mail with turds in it.).
SCHEDULE We want you to come back and keep voting.
Here is when things are happening: Thursday, 3/17#1: Top 64 SportsMonday, 3/21#2: Top 32 “Thick 32“Thursday, 3/24#3: Top 16 “Sports 16“Monday, 3/28#4: Top 8 “Athletic 8“Thursday, 3/31#5: Top 4 “Finalized 4“Monday, 4/4#6: Top 2 “Best Sport Championship Matchup“Thursday, 4/7#7: Crown The Winner!