New iPhone Features

Apple announced an updated version of the iPhone today. Here are some new features to look forward to.

• Ultra-high resolution camera designed specifically for dick pics.
• Additional bottom facing camera for dick pics.
• High intensity flash designed to evenly illuminate your dick.
• Secondary flash designed for balls.
• Separate designated folder for dick pics.
• New photo editing application that enables you tweak the size/girth/color of your dick.
• Easier access to dick pic applications like Snapchat and iMessage.
• Specially curated Apple Music playlists for dick pic photoshoots.
• Enhanced Voice Memo application, designed specifically to pick up sound-waves of your dick.
• Weather application now includes temperature of your dick.
• Notes application outfitted with special graph for logging the size of your dick on different days.
• Siri now loaded with hundreds of dick pic-taking tips.
• Apple Maps now pinpoints exact location of your dick.
• Two words: dick Emojis.
• Longer battery life.