By: Jenny Nelson

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7 Less Demanding Summer Alternatives To Beach Bod

With summer fast approaching, it might seem like every babe and Bob is getting their bod bikini-ready. But what if you take issue with a person subjecting themselves to months of training and dieting simply to satisfy an antiquated set of problematic ideals like a busty chest, flat abs, and curvy ass? Or maybe you just don ‘t like sand? Here are 7 new looks ideal for destinations that are NOT the beach that you should look into this summer.

Catholic Camp Bod

  • dusty knees from many installments of outside prayer
  • flexible fingers for if you ‘re doing “Here is the church, here is the steeple, open the doors, and here are the people”
  • sweaty, slightly stinky pits

Restaurant With Outdoor Seating Bod

  • lightly tousled hair
  • legs that fit under table
  • presentable, expressive face for communicating with waiters

Ice Cream Parlor Summer Job Bod

  • chubby tummy
  • chilled, dry handskin
  • long tongue for licking deep into cones to get the ice cream out of the bottom

Attending Pool Party With Shirt On Bod

  • no rules about swimsuits since you ‘re the dad so you won ‘t be swimming
  • hands that are good for gripping the steering wheel when driving kids to the pool
  • height greater than deepest part of the pool

Log Ride Bod

  • big, wet, baggy raisin skin
  • hands straight up in the air to express enjoyment
  • perfect vision since glasses are inconvenient on log rides

3D Movie Theater With Air Conditioning Bod

  • tired elbows that require adequate arm rests
  • slippery fingers impervious to sticky popcorn salt
  • perfect vision since glasses are inconvenient at 3D movies

Ran Into A Yellow Jacket Nest And I ‘m Allergic Bod

  • itchy, red, and bumpy all over
  • watery, bloodshot eyes
  • closed up throat that ‘s difficult to call for help through

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