By: Fruit Chicken
Americans Stand Up To Change The News Channel
PENSACOLA, FL – Outrage struck the Carson house Tuesday night when Mr. Carson came home from a long day of work and couldn ‘t find his remote control. He took a seat on his limited edition, reclining chair; with the remote control holder built into the armrest. The 6 o'clock news was on the TV and Mr. Carson was not ready for the daily report. ” I ‘m behind on Game of Thrones, I don ‘t want to see a bunch of senseless murder on T.V. I want to change the channel, ‘ said the Florida resident, who was forced to stand up from his comfortable Osaki OS-Pro Dreamer 3D 2-Stage Zero Gravity Accupoint Massage Chair.”I shouldn ‘t have to feel any discomfort in the safety of my own home, I want the freedom to choose what to care about, ‘ exclaimed Carson as he flipped several cushions and chairs in hopes of finding the remote. The news of two civilians murdered by police officers was blasting through his surround sound speakers, inside the theater room of his 25 acre estate. Several of Carson ‘s remotes had gone missing, his loss was clearly devastating all the man wanted to do was tune out. Taking matters in to his own hands, traveled to his local best buy to purchase a universal remote. “This is outrageous, I am an American,do I not deserve basic rights?”cried Carson on facebook as he changed his facebook profile to a picture of his black remote. He began to rally as much support as he could, writing petitions to Change.org and creating a GoFundMe page so no other individuals would suffer the same fate he did. Support started to pour in from all over America. “This is a movement everyone can relate to, it transcends; race, sexuality, and class,”said Rebecca Kiersch, an Indiana resident, protesting outside of FOX 5. Kiersch started selling universal remotes outside of her local quick stop “so no one would have to suffer, ‘ the same fate she had. “I ‘ve seen it all, rape cases, murders, drone strikes, it ‘s horrific to come home and not be able to find the remote. Especially, when you ‘re already comfortably in your chair, ‘ said Kiersch as she wiped a tear from her eye. These events happen all over the United States and now with the power of social media are gaining traction. With stories like Carson and Kiersch being a catalyst for a movement, the freedom to ignore the reality of the world. Tune out.