By: Keaton Patti

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10 Places You Shouldn ‘t Store Condoms

  • Your wallet – This can tear and deteriorate the condom.
  • In my roommate Steve ‘s room – He ‘ll eat them.
  • Your aquarium – The water will damage the condom and the fish will use them before you can.
  • The glovebox of your car – If pulled over, a cop will see them when you get your registration and then you ‘ll have to have sex with the cop. That ‘s the law.
  • Near your dog ‘s food – The dog will try to eat them, but Steve will beat him to it.
  • Behind the framed picture of your mom – That wouldn ‘t be right. Your mom hated condoms, hence why you ‘re alive.
  • In a church – Condoms burst into flames inside a house of God. Plus, Steve ‘s a priest, so he ‘ll probably be there and eat them.
  • On the back of the Mona Lisa – You ‘ll need to assemble a heist team every time you want to have sex. Plus, it ‘s in France, where condoms aren ‘t allowed.
  • In Steve ‘s mouth – You know why.
  • On your penis – Condoms should never be near a penis. It ruins them.

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