JESUS CHRIST-MAS CRAFT FAIR!

If you saw “Cloud Atlas” this weekend, you know that it’s a beautiful, wonderful mess, with big stars playing several different characters spanning across time and space. Sure Halle Berry plays a Jewish wife and an Asian doctor, but the best casting choice was viscous, cannibal Hugh Grant. He doesn’t get to say one word while wearing insane snake makeup, but if he did, this is what I would have liked for him to say.