By: Evan Waite

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7 Ethnic Foods Pop-Pop Won ‘t Even Try

We tried to get Pop-Pop to be open-minded about tasting food from other countries, but the old guy is pretty set in his ways. We did the best we could.


Kimchi

Country of origin: Korea

Result: After sniffing the dish, Pop-Pop accused the Korean people of trying to kill him with spice, saying ‘that ‘s what they do. ‘

Quote from Pop-Pop: “I ain ‘t eatin ‘ no kim cheese. ‘


Jerk chicken

Country of origin: Jamaica

Result: We almost got Pop-Pop to taste this one by saying we got it from KFC, but he got wise to the ruse when he didn ‘t see a bucket. When he learned it was a Jamaican dish, he claimed we were trying to get him drunk on weed meat.

Quote from Pop-Pop: “No way mon. ‘


Latke

Country of origin: Germany

Result: Not even a nibble. Pop-Pop called us fascists and said he would rather die than eat ‘kraut cakes. ‘

Quote from Pop-Pop: “[unintelligible muttering about Normandy] ‘


Baklava

Country of origin: Turkey

Result: Pop-Pop said since the country is called Turkey, they should just serve that. He seemed furious at the notion of pistachios in a dessert.

Quote from Pop-Pop: “Whatever happened to just eating a damn Oreo? ‘


Haggis

Country of origin: Scotland

Result: Pop-Pop said it smelled horrible, and he had a point. We didn ‘t eat any either.

Quote from Pop-Pop: “Just throw it in the neighbor ‘s yard. Let the raccoons have at it. ‘


Sashimi

Country of origin: Japan

Result: Pop-Pop pushed the plate away and told a meandering story about an Asian cashier who didn ‘t double bag his groceries once. He then mumbled to no one in particular that he ‘s always thought Lucy Liu was a “hot little chickadee. ‘ When it was pointed out that the actress is Chinese-American and was born in Queens, he did a jerk-off hand gesture and took a long pull from his tall boy.

Quote from Pop-Pop: “She speaks good English. I like that. ‘


Chutney

Country of origin: India

Result: Pop-Pop knocked the bowl off the table and told us to bring him a hot dog.

Quote from Pop-Pop: “No, you clean it up. ‘

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