By: Malcolm Kelner

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Who Said You Could Use My Driveway To Turn Your Car Around?

Umm, hello? Excuse me! What are you doing? Why are you driving your car into my driveway? Who are you? I don ‘t recognize your car. None of my friends or family have a blue Corolla.

What ‘s going on here? This is private property, you know, and now you ‘re trespassing because I never gave you permission to do this. Am I going to have to come out and say something? Don ‘t make me say something.

‘I never gave you permission to do this.

Oh, I see, so now you ‘re backing your car out so you can turn around and go the other way, huh? Interesting. Apparently you think you can use my driveway as your personal little runway to do whatever the hell you want and go wherever you please.

You couldn ‘t have just waited until the next intersection to turn around? There ‘s a cul-de-sac right down that way off of Wilson Drive where you also could have done it without invading my home. Who do you think you are?

Yeah, go ahead, drive off the same way you came from. Get out of here. You got away just in time before I really showed you! Do it again. I dare you. Watch what happens.

This is my driveway.

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