By: Pitch

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How To Spend Your Free Time Now That There’s No More Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus

Now that Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus has shut down after 146 years, both audiences and performers are going to have a lot more time on their hands. Here are plenty of options for filling the void in your life.

Take shrooms at the zoo

Abandon your kids in a regular tent

Protect children from all those unemployed clowns

Get your large mammal abuse fix at SeaWorld instead

Buy their domain name and turn it into a porn site

Throw peanut shells at people on the street instead of people at the circus

Go back to meeting little people for casual sex the old fashioned way (at carnivals)

Enlist in the military as a human cannonball

Take a road trip in a tiny car with 40 of your closest friends.

[sigh] Get into sports ‘

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