By: Matt Calanese
8 Signs That Your Dog Is Actually In Love With You
1. He puts his tongue in your mouth while licking your face.
It ‘s normal for dogs to lick your face, but this classic move is played by every dog that ‘s trying to bone his owner. A quick, ‘accidental ‘ french kiss from your french bulldog.
2. He brings you dead birds as presents.
You call it a dead bird, your dog calls it an exciting new sex toy.
3. He makes a point to pant and salivate around you.
It ‘s because he ‘s super turned on and wants to make out with you, and shows it in an almost cartoonish way.
4. Doesn ‘t pressure you to do anal.
Doing butt stuff can be a sensitive subject, and if your dog hasn ‘t brought it up, it ‘s because Scraps loves you way too much to rock the boat with such a bold proposition.
5. He puts peanut butter on his balls.
Dogs talk to each other, and they all know about those kids that trick their dogs to lick peanut butter off their balls. A dog in love will definitely flip this around and turn it into their most desperate act of love.
6. He sniffs other dogs ‘ butts.
To your dog, sniffing a butt is the biggest way to say ‘hey, I like you. ‘ If he ‘s sniffing dog butt in front of you, it ‘s because he wants you to see him sniffing dog butt. This is a petty move to try and make you jealous.
7. He shits outside.
Anyone who ‘s had to learn exactly where it ‘s ok for them to poop knows that it takes a lot of patience and dedication to master toilet training. You know what else takes a lot of patience and dedication? Love, my friend.
8. He doesn ‘t complain that you named him ‘Chance. ‘
If your parents named you and your twin ‘Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen ‘ after watching Full House, you ‘d be just as pissed off as a dog being named after the lovable mutt from Homeward Bound: the Incredible Journey. If he hasn ‘t griped about it yet, it ‘s because he ‘s hoping for another shot at \#1 on this list.
