Grown Man Assures Friend Group That New Spider-Man Movie Is Gonna Be Different

This weekend Spider-Man: Homecoming swings into theaters and let me tell you I am pretty excited. Spider-Man is one of Marvel Comics ‘ most popular characters, so this film will without a doubt be a huge summer blockbuster. This will be the 6th time the web-slinger has been on the big screen since 2002, but this ain ‘t your daddy ‘s Spider-Man: this Spider-Man is gonna be different.

We haven ‘t seen a Spider-Man quite like this before! Sure his name is still Peter Parker, a young man from Queens NY who is bitten by a radioactive spider and is given spider-like abilities and decides to become a superhero, but this time he is A KID! That ‘s right, Spider-Man is not a man at all: he ‘s a BOY. A high school boy superhero; that ‘s pretty cool and definitely different than before!

In this new Spider-Man movie, Spidey faces off with a villain by the name of Vulture, who is an old man who wears a green suit that can fly around. No not like Green Goblin in the other movies. No it ‘s not the same, it ‘s different; he ‘s a bird not a goblin! Goblins aren ‘t even real, birds are. Come on.

Oh! This Spider-Man also exists within the Marvel Cinematic Universe so Iron Man is there too! That ‘s so different! Spider-Man joined the MCU in Captain America: Civil War, which was pretty cool and funny,definitely funnier and cooler than the other Spider-Man movies. This movie seems like it ‘s gonna keep that consistent. Trust me!

We probably won ‘t see Uncle Ben (the old guy who always tells Peter ‘with great power comes great responsibility ‘) get killed which is usually my favorite part but everything else about the movie seems pretty tight so I am willing to make that sacrifice. On the plus side, Aunt May is hot AF so I mean I guess you win some you lose some.

So how about it, gang? If I get all our tickets right now will you go with me? Come on, please? It ‘s gonna be different. I promise! You didn ‘t like the other Spider-Man movies? So what?! This one isn ‘t gonna be like those. Please!