22 Delicious Tweets That Have Zero To Do With Politics

Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat adding sage. pic.twitter.com/5JCO10MWt0

‘ Daniel Kibblesmith ?? (@kibblesmith) September 6, 2017

---

wife: how was ur day honey
husband: incredible. I was invited by travelocity to shout about my experience on facebook.

‘ Noah Prestwich (@NoahPwich) September 6, 2017

---

Quick mock for a really dumb app I wish existed…. CAN I PARK HERE OR NOT? pic.twitter.com/Fu2D9pyWW5

‘ Tara Mann (@taramann) September 2, 2017

---

Girls spend $70 on an outfit and curl hair and put on makeup just to hook up with a frat boy in a Hawaiian shirt who peed his bed last night

‘ Anna (@letsgetfunke) September 3, 2017

---

Life is just repurchasing your favorite movies in increasingly higher definitions until you die.

‘ Matt Roller (@rolldiggity) September 4, 2017

---

so emotional about the return of #endlessshrimp I made a cake out of 40 cheddar bay biscuits & took it to a @redlobster pic.twitter.com/lVkQgyx7TA

‘ Logan Guntzelman (@adirtyguntz) September 7, 2017

---

[New, dark Taylor Swift at the movies] “one ticket to Stephen King's It please, which is a comedy to me by the way”

‘ Fred Delicious (@Fred_Delicious) September 5, 2017

---

Oh no. Oh no, the website… pic.twitter.com/gelKz7GXM5

‘ Amityville Amber (@ElementalAmber) September 1, 2017

---

It's a beautiful day pic.twitter.com/yafyGPBU8M

‘ schwarz crow (@schwarzcrow94) August 31, 2017

---

[shark tank]
me: ridiculously wide sunglasses
shark 1: i'm out
shark 2: i'm out
hammerhead shark: i'm listening

‘ andrew (@AndrewChamings) September 1, 2017

---

The original title of So You Think You Can Dance was So You're A Mormon Man With A Big Secret.

‘ Louis Virtel (@louisvirtel) September 2, 2017

---

I'm going to need a little more on the backstory here please. pic.twitter.com/2K7vCyoUEA

‘ All Berets Matter (@AllBeretsMatter) September 2, 2017

---

Stacking dice on a cat’s foot pic.twitter.com/yxF8Bmyfmv

‘ Nature is Amazing (@AMAZlNGNATURE) September 4, 2017

---

[my wife to everyone at the pool party] pls don't tell him, he's never known the truth
[me loudly as I jump off the diving board] CABIN BALL

‘ Ygrene (@Ygrene) September 2, 2017

---

PISS IN THE FROG'S MOUTH LIKE A MEN!! pic.twitter.com/FbwPkKDOUf

‘ Sam Chaplin (@SamChaplin) September 4, 2017

---

I like how men get their hair cut when they hit puberty and then that's just the way they do their hair for their whole lives.

‘ jess (@jessokfine) September 4, 2017

---

pic.twitter.com/S7DCnkNspy

‘ childish sadbino (@datassque) August 31, 2017

---

A great moment in movie history is when Harvey can’t recognize The Joker until he takes off his surgery mask. pic.twitter.com/nFbS8qMn4F

‘ David S. (@AE_DavidS) August 31, 2017

---

you know I keep that mf thang on me pic.twitter.com/JcAJk1Y3jH

‘ NachoManRandySadness (@juckfohn) September 2, 2017