22 Delicious Tweets That Have Zero To Do With Politics

YO i ‘m way too high………. if you work at a farm & your job is to take care of the chickens, you are a chicken tender wow

‘ faithful dominican (@engxl) December 21, 2017

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2 months, 2 restarts and a loss of my sanity later, I ‘m almost done. pic.twitter.com/c2uvt4Xwer

‘ Gurekbal Bhachu (@G_Singh_B) December 22, 2017

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2018 startin out ROUGH for Nick pic.twitter.com/b8GQA9JQlb

‘ Nikki Blonsky from the movie Hairspray (@lobbyspider) January 1, 2018

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[on the phone] honey im at the store are we out of raccoon penis bones pic.twitter.com/2XFjQTsNox

‘ bobby (@bobby) December 23, 2017

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Remember as days get colder, animals are attracted to the warmth of cars so check wheel arches or other hiding places. #ItsSoCold pic.twitter.com/idvsHOCT6H

‘ Trooper Ben (@TrooperBenKHP) December 28, 2017

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I bought this potato just because I felt bad for it pic.twitter.com/b8MIPGDFAl

‘ brady zipoffs (VERIFlED) (@zipoffs) March 24, 2017

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my dog got a haircut and now it looks like he gave up drinking. pic.twitter.com/ROatm9cl6v

‘ Morgan Murphy (@morgan_murphy) December 17, 2017

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Alien Pez dispenser. Awesome. pic.twitter.com/RlbJPtdwHU

‘ TODD SPENCE (@Todd_Spence) December 20, 2017

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Made a huge mistake and ordered the mozzarella listening menu at Mozza. Should’ve gone with the tasting.

‘ Andr ‘s du Bouchet (@dubouchet) December 20, 2017

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This is the most baller move of 2018, let alone 2017. Shut it down. @LiquidHbox pic.twitter.com/y8gcYTLSiv

‘ Arda ‘cal (@ArdaOcalTV) December 21, 2017

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woW Gotye really disappeared off the face of the planet and literally became somebody that we used to know, iconic

‘ indie (@INDIEWASHERE) December 21, 2017

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When you the last person in dodgeball pic.twitter.com/wCBwlp86og

‘ Boyz N The Society ‘ (@HeadGraphix) December 15, 2017

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*receiving kiss of death* Cool, first base.

‘ John Lyon (@JohnLyonTweets) December 20, 2017

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duane reade locked the candy section 🙁 pic.twitter.com/SqqTFVwk0X

‘ Kelly Weill (@KELLYWEILL) January 4, 2018

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I told my girlfriend I wrote her a poem but it was just the theme song to King of Queens. pic.twitter.com/2B1H6n7XtX

‘ Mike Recine (@mikerecine) August 29, 2017

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I ‘m “keep having to rewind Cheers ‘ stoned.

‘ Patrick Walsh (@thepatrickwalsh) December 17, 2017

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watched a documentary about sex dolls and at the end one guy takes his doll skydiving pic.twitter.com/pQwn8SML69

‘ Joe Veix (@joeveix) January 1, 2018

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Goofy [as an art critic]: gauche

‘ Mike RIPby (@MikeBigby) March 21, 2017

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Why this cup about to bust pic.twitter.com/EquePhB2kT

‘ Tommy McNamara (@TommyMcNam) December 27, 2017

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RIP cat who thought sunglasses would stop Medusa pic.twitter.com/lpHNuRGdJy

‘ Joe Saunders (@saundersjoe) October 5, 2017

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One time I saw Sam Elliott sneeze in a restaurant and a frisbee fell out of his mustache.

‘ Steve Agee (@steveagee) December 30, 2017

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good news everyone first keanu pic of 2018 pic.twitter.com/ufxYkjBSQ2

‘ bushra (@keanusreeve) January 2, 2018

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And finally to 2017 ‘

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