By: Dashiell Driscoll
Email Asking Boss For Day Off Because Old Man From ‘Pawn Stars’ Died
To: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Family emergency. Can ‘t come to work.
Steven
No time to talk. Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work today.
-Ted
To: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
Oh no! I ‘m so sorry to hear that. I hope everything is alright with your family. Please let me know if you need anything.
-Steven
To: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
Oh, everything is fine with my family. It ‘s the guy from Pawn Stars. The old one. He died.
As you can imagine, I ‘m pretty upset. Thank you for your prayers in this dark time.
-Ted
To: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
Wait, your family emergency is that the old guy from Pawn Stars died?
To: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
I never said it was my family emergency. I just said it was *a* family emergency.
-Ted
To: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
I don ‘t think I follow.
To: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
I used to watch this show all the time in college when I was hungover.
-Ted
To: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
‘Was there more to that email?
To: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
No.
-Ted
To: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
Ted,
I appreciate the fact that you ‘re upset right now. But I don ‘t know if the old guy from Pawn Stars dying merits you taking a day off when your only connection to the show is you used to watch it a lot when you were hungover in college.
To: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
Good call. I better take the week off just to be safe.
-Ted
To: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
This feels eerily similar to the time you took a “six day weekend ‘ (pretty sure that ‘s not a thing) when American Idol was cancelled.
To: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
I WAS DEVASTATED AND YOU KNOW IT.
-Ted
To: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
‘Then took a “seven day weekend ‘ (definitely not a thing) when it came back this year.
To: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
I WAS HYSTERICAL WITH JOY AND YOU KNOW IT.
-Ted
To: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
Do you even know his name?
To: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
RYAN SEACREAST.
-Ted
To: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
No, the old guy from Pawn Stars.
To: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
Bryan Seacreast?
-Ted
To: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
You ‘re fired, Ted.
To: Steven@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
From: Ted@BusinessSolutionsTeam.net
Subject: Re: Family emergency. Can ‘t come in to work.
Brutal. I ‘m going to need a 12 day weekend to regroup.
-Ted
