By: Darren Miller
This has to be some kind of record for fastest (and dumbest) data breach.
It only took ONE DAY for brand new Trump Supporter dating site, Donald Daters, to leak ALL its user data. Like Trump himself, the site has managed to do something impressive and unprecedented, by completely screwing over the people it serves.
A french security researcher who goes by the name of Elliot Alderson (after the protagonist of dystopian hacker drama Mr. Robot (which I highly recommend)) apparently only needed five minutes to access its complete user database, along with all their personal info, their private messages, and the ability to steal their current session.
He tweeted in response to a Fox News post about the app, which is probably not what the team behind the app was expecting when they got the free advertising:
You should not use this app. In 5 minutes, I managed to get:
– the list of all the people registered
– personal messages
– token to steal their session
Thread ?? https://t.co/72KdNJTrmk
‘ Elliot Alderson (@fs0c131y) October 15, 2018
The app ‘s founder has already issued a statement claiming to have fixed the problem, but the app has now been exposed in more ways than one, and I ‘ve noticed a lot more problems with this thing. We ‘ll start with this though:
The metaphorical irony of this situation is too much to bear
Are you kidding me with this shit? An overtly partisan tool meant to bring people together and improve their lives makes false claims about its trustworthiness and ability to secure its own database, and IMMEDIATELY begins to screw over the very people it specifically targeted its overblown claims to in the first place. Sound familiar? Honestly, I ‘d feel bad for these people, but like, fool me once, y ‘know?
But there ‘s more of this shit that these people need to answer for.
Donald Daters, new app for Trump supporters, aims to 'Make America Date Again' https://t.co/mOI1DY4d8n
‘ Fox News (@FoxNews) October 15, 2018
What the shit kind of name is “Donald Daters ‘?
Who can possibly picture themselves ever saying, “Oh we met on Donald Daters ‘ with a straight face.
“I ‘m on Donald Daters. ‘
“Are you on Donald Daters? ‘
“Oh, I love Donald Daters, it ‘s great. ‘
The fuck? Nope. Come up with even an OKAY name for your dating site, PLEASE. At this point that ‘s really all you need to do. They have these “build your own dating app ‘ apps already done for you so the name is honestly the only work you ‘re putting into this, beyond convincing Fox News to tweet about it. Like a 3/10 name would ‘ve been FINE. I mean this name literally means “people who date Donald. ‘
I know it was day one, but now that we ‘ve got all this data, we might as well use it to support this claim and say that leaked database only had about 1600 users in it. And I doubt there are still 1600 on day 2. I wonder if there ‘s a dating site dedicated to Trumpgretters. Maybe now there can be a site for DonaldDatergretters.
Also, “Make America Date Again ‘? What?
Don ‘t you think it ‘s a little weird for the slogan of a dating site to have undertones of non-consent? Here ‘s another tip for when you ‘re building a dating site: don ‘t imply you ‘re gonna force your users into… anything? I think the intention is clear so I ‘m inclined to give them a pass on this in the end, but at this point all bets are off since a more accurate slogan is now “Make America Doxxed Again. ‘
Let ‘s go ahead and talk about this stock photo on your homepage
Show me a happy interracial trump supporter couple and I ‘ll show you a statistical anomaly. You don ‘t have to pretend to be anything you ‘re not, Donald Dater (oh wow, calling Donald Dater Donald Dater is very fun). You ‘re literally targeting your app to people who support white supremacy AND male supremacy.
You might be thinking, “there ‘s no winning with you – if it ‘d been two white people, you ‘d be complaining about how white it is, ‘ and you ‘re absolutely right. I ‘d still complain that the manipulative and creepy slogan is right on top of the photo of a man embracing a woman who may or may not feel safe with him given his political views though. And I ‘d be right back to the same complaint about you being disingenuous if you showed an accurate representation of your user base, two white men, because clearly none of them support homosexuality. So no, you can ‘t win with me! It ‘s almost like you ‘re trying to attract users based on social and political views that make it difficult for two people to even exist in a healthy, loving relationship based on kindness, respect, and compassion.
I get it though. This just isn ‘t for me. Of course my views are highly partisan, and completely subjective, and I should be more open minded to the potential for two people to fall in love based on a shared political ideology of bigotry and abuse, which is somehow against your user guidelines. Hope your moderation team is more prepared than your security team!
Why is this even real? We joked about this multiple years ago
We made a sketch about this in 2016, because it would be ridiculous for this to actually exist.
But here we are! Nostalgic for the days when the FarmersOnly commercials were the creepiest thing in the dating app world.
Anyway, let ‘s at least hope this is the end for everyday Americans being taken advantage of by the
administration dating app they invest in!
Man attempting to jump off deck faceplants over his bike. Thanks to: youtube.com/TheWesalex For more FAIL visit http://failblog.org