By: Funny Or Die

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Gift Guide: The Perfect Socks For Every Sock Crisis

Sure, maybe you have some good everyday socks, and some good work socks. But your life is a lot more complex than that, and when you find yourself in a situation where you don ‘t have the right socks, things go downhill pretty quickly. Once when I was a kid I wore crew socks to soccer practice and my shinguards fell off. I ended up with a broken shin and a new nickname: “Wrongsock ‘.

It was humiliating.

Luckily the holidays are here and the best thing to stuck stockings with is more socks. So let ‘s cover all our bases and find the best socks for every situation that might induce serious sock anxiety.

For when you ‘re fully naked but your feet are still cold

Your feet will look like a hairy chest, but you ‘re still basically naked.

For when you think your pants may be too short but you ‘re not sure what ‘s currently fashionable

Socks that say “just in case, this is on purpose. ‘

For when you wear boat shoes barefoot and all your friends complain about the smell

These no show socks should cover up your disgusting smelly blisters, you monster. Never try that again, please.

For when you ‘re not athletic at all but maybe if people see you in these socks they ‘ll think you are

“Oh these? Yeah, I work out a lot so I ‘m really into ‘The Swoosh ‘. ‘

For unapologetic dads

The term “dad bod ‘ died as soon as dads themselves were allowed to use it.

For reenacting that scene from Risky Business

I ‘m gonna make the leap that if you ‘re this into doing this, you ‘re gonna go all out and make sure it ‘s perfect. Here ‘s a pack of 6.

For when there ‘s a formal event and you can wear that one formal outfit you wear to every formal event but you don ‘t have any formal socks

Cause your one formal outfit is also just a tuxedo on a shirt

For when you lose your shoes

This is a very stylish look and no one will notice

For when you get all these socks and “new sock feeling ‘ becomes an addictive drug

Just 144 pairs of socks, nbd.

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