Clemson University ‘s national champion football team, the Tigers, were invited over to the White House for a feast on Monday, but the administration ran into a bit of a problem when they realized
“Wait a second. The White House kitchen is closed because
we fucking shut down the government ‘
But that ‘s fine, no bigs, Trump had a solution. Why not treat these nationally ranked athletes to a cornucopia offast food, the likes of which 17-year-old stoners could only dream of.
Getty Images
Trump ‘s a thinker, that ‘s why he gets paid the big bucks.
In a video shared on twitter, Trump is seen proudly showing off his army of 300 burgers while moving like a goddamn animatronic figure someone just sprung from a 1960 ‘s Disney musical ride.
And then, just when we thought this laziest-of-all-White-House-lunches couldn ‘t get any more ridiculous (just kidding, we all fucking knew it would) Trump blessed everyones twitter feed with this marvel of the English language.
twitter grab
Computer, ENHANCE
Sorry, 1000 w h a t
Hamberders.
H A M B E R D E R S
Just to emphasize how much this wasn ‘t a typo, please observe the following diagrams, provided by our investigative journalism and forensics teams.
See, hambirger or even hamborger would have been an understandable error. Thumbs slip, accidents happen, typing is hard when you have tiny hands. But please note how very far apart and not at all in close proximity to each other the letters E and U are situated on the keyboard.
FURTHERMORE, your honor, the next move made after the letter R will prove the intent to grossly misspell.
As you can clearly see, the motion in which one would make towards the letter D are in an entirely different direction from the letter G.
No, America, this was no typo.
The upsetting truth of the matter is
The president of the United States, the man who has the launch codes, genuinely thought hamberder was a real word.
Jeeeeee-suuuuuuuuuus
Is anyone really surprised though? After covfefe anything goes. Nothing matters, spell shit however you want to, these are lawless times. Honestly the most shocking thing about that entire lunch was that he managed to count all the way up to 300.
today we lost a master of pranks, RIP Blaine. feat. original song by Nick Lutsko: http://bit.ly/2cpN9CN lyrics: David Blaine Things will never be the same When you ripped out your heart You ripped out our hearts too It’s a shame There won’t be anymore pranks But you won’t die in vain Cause we’ll remember you What did you do to that chicken? Do I even want to know? I stay up nights feeling sick I can’t sleep cause I’ve got Blaine on my brain Blaine on my brain Blaine on my brain Got David Blaine on my brain We’re celebrating Blaine
The Game of Life is won by buttoned-up pros. With the right tools and the Toyota Prius c, there is no limit to what you can accomplish. Let the game begin.
We use cookies to optimize our website and our service.
Functional
Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes.The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
