By: Sloane Hughes
Friends, meme lovers, fellow users of the internet, it is with a heavy heart and profound sadness that I announce the death of our beloved 69 joke.
For decades, perhaps even since it was coined as a sex thing, the response to 69 in any and every scenario has been “nice. ‘
69 unread emails? Nice.
69% phone battery? Nice.
$20.69 in your checking account? Nice.
But that ‘s all over now, because earlier today, President Trump tweeted this
The Gallup Poll just announced that 69% of our great citizens expect their finances to improve next year, a 16 year high. Nice!
‘ Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) February 13, 2019
It ‘s hard to say whether or not the joke was intentional, and it ‘s hard to say which would be worse. He either has no idea that this is a pillar of internet humor or he ‘s aware and attempted to be funny with it. Either way, it ‘s ruined. He killed it. Trump has killed 69.
And today, we all mourn its passing. Please, remove your hats, bow your heads, and exhibit a moment of silence while you read these tweets.
folks i'm sorry, 69 is cancelled
‘ Ashley Feinberg (@ashleyfeinberg) February 13, 2019
I know; the 69 tweet thing is so stupid but please let me have this
‘ Asawin Suebsaeng (@swin24) February 13, 2019
Excited to announce my new book, an oral history of Trump's 69 tweet. Here's a sneak peek: pic.twitter.com/aeZHraxaW7
‘ David A. Graham (@GrahamDavidA) February 13, 2019
farewell 69, you had a good run pic.twitter.com/Yd7HNt9Hio
‘ shauna (@goldengateblond) February 13, 2019
trump making a 69 joke is surprisingly a bummer to me
‘ kill tim faust (@crulge) February 13, 2019
Wow trump a 69 guy, no surprise there https://t.co/9VP7Do63oj
‘ kyle (@kgeich) February 13, 2019
Trump taking away 69 being funny is up there on his worst sins.
‘ JD (@Sta7ic) February 13, 2019
Ah shit, Trump did a 69/nice tweet, which means I'm never going to do one again, which means there's little reason for anyone to follow me anymore
‘ Scott McLaughlin (@smclaughlin9) February 13, 2019
Trump's worst crime is now killing the 69 meme
‘ Horrendous Jake Kablooie (@JakeMHS) February 13, 2019
Trump killing the 69 joke is so on brand it feels impossible.
Every fucking time he finds something pure and beautiful he ruins it.
‘ Patriot Missive (@IDtheMIKE) February 13, 2019
The new Valentine's Day Massacre is when Trump ruined 69 jokes for everyone
‘ Thom Is A Flat Circle (@thomdunn) February 13, 2019
Chris Hardwick leads three celebrity contestants down the ultimate internet wormhole. Culling from the darkest recesses of social media, they compete to determine who will be the funniest person for the next twenty three and a half hours.