By: Sloane Hughes
Pete Davidson and Kate Beckinsale were caught sucking face at a hockey game and you ‘re probably asking, “why should I care? ‘ And that is a great question. I have no idea. But it ‘s trending and I can ‘t escape it because apparently that ‘s just where we are as a society now. Two adults making out in public, these are the things that matter. I don ‘t know what circle of hell this is exactly but Jesus Christ sometimes I wish nuclear war would just break out and end it all so I don ‘t have to write about this shit for clicks.
Sometimes I have moments where I think to myself, “Why am I such a jaded asshole? Just let tabloids be tabloids, none of this matters, ‘ and it is in these moments that I am grateful for people like my good friend Dan Sheehan, who chimes in with validating comments like, “Very cool that we ‘re running out of topsoil and we ‘ve gotta read about a horny sketch comedian all the time, ‘ and reminds me that, yeah, that ‘s why I ‘m a jaded asshole: because this really is dumb as shit. It ‘s so dumb.
In conjunction with people like Dan who reassure me that I ‘m not a tool for thinking, “God this is so stupid, ‘ on a near hourly basis while searching the internet for things to write about, I ‘m also grateful for meme culture. Because the only way to get through the bombardment of viral news as inane and pointless as photos of Pete Davidson and Kate Beckinsale swapping spit at a hockey game is by slapping it with labels that read “me ‘, “my depression ‘, and “my anxiety ‘ and jamming it into my empty skull. Just ram all of that shit in there. Evict my last two brain cells, fill it with tweets.
Here are some of the memes and commentary that made this inescapable, somehow breaking news story a little bit more tolerable.