By: Sloane Hughes
A picture is worth a thousand words, and when it comes to stock photos, those words are often completely insane. Stock photos are used regularly for editorial, commercial, and entertainment purposes and usually the pictures people or companies are looking for are things like, “businesswoman sitting at desk ‘ or “man looking at cellphone ‘. Very regular, run-of-the-mill stuff. But for every normal stock photo out there, there ‘s one completely batshit stock photo also in existence.
There ‘s really not a lot I can do to prepare you for these, but before we get into it I just want you to keep a few questions at the forefront of your mind.
- Who thought this was necessary?
- Who is buying and using this photo?
- (You don ‘t have to keep this one in mind but it ‘s probably gonna just happen naturally) What the fuck?
Alright, buckle up folks.
Mother, is the child ripe yet?
Just ironing out some back wrinkles I ‘ll be ready in a sec (also: limbs are not supposed to do that)
I wish I was ever this excited about grocery shopping honestly
Just your average day at gam-gams
“Hey Jason those first six shots were great but I think we just need you to show a little bit more enthusiasm while you ‘re inside the noose ‘
Is this Jean-Claude Van Damme
Man don ‘t you hate it when your giant cat who boxes beats the shit out of you
“Hey yeah I can for sure write that down for you, I have a free hand ‘
And my favorite niche of crazy stock photos: people pointing guns at things
Sir please I just want my salad
HAHA, I ‘ll see you in hell you dumb fish
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Donald Trump addresses his controversial decision to rescind protections for transgender students bathroom use.
No one understands the sequester so The White House takes some time to try and explain it to the public.
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Never allow the suspect (you) to tamper with the potential crime scene (also you). Only allow your belly to be touched by men and Republicans. The easiest way to accomplish this is to build an iron cage that ends just above your belly. Give the key to your priest. Don ‘t have a priest? Wow, you ‘re dying to go to jail, aren ‘t you, Abortia?