By: Sloane Hughes
It ‘s real easy to judge people when you ‘re on the outside looking in, especially when that someone is a celebrity as famous as Nicolas Cage. Celebrities don ‘t have regular people problems, they ‘re obscenely wealthy and they all have great skin and get free shit everywhere they go, so usually I ‘m all for having a laugh at their expense. But listen dude, we ‘ve all got our own shit going on, and sometimes the right thing to do is just say, “ugh, man, that blows. ‘ So that ‘s what I ‘m going to do here, this isn ‘t a slam piece, this is me ‘ for probably the first and only time in my life ‘ really relating to a celebrity.
I don ‘t know if you guys have been keeping up with Nic Cage but he ‘s really going through it lately. Lemme get you up to speed. ‘
He recently got hitched in Vegas ‘ such a classic bored rich person stunt but hey, it happens. He and his bride, Erika Koike, had been dating for a year which seems like a decent enough amount of time. But also, just generally speaking, if you go to Vegas to get married chances are that ‘s not gonna be the most stable union.
So, because nothing pairs as well with Vegas weddings like instant regret and a swift split, national treasure Nic Cage filed for an annulment after only four days of being married. Oof.
And as if going through a super awkward and short lived drunk marriage and then splitting up in front of basically the whole world wasn ‘t bad enough, Erika Kioke is actually demanding spousal support.
Imagine being married to someone for less than a standard work week and then them having the audacity to demand you fund their life.
That ‘s enough to send anyone spiralling, but it ‘s not an uncommon story. So I bet you ‘re asking yourself, “where ‘s the part where I ‘m supposed to feel for him? Where ‘s the relatability?? ‘
Well, Nic Cage handled this whole thing in the most understandable, just-your-average-guy way possible.
He got wasted and angrily sang some brutal and truly heartfelt karaoke.
And, dude, I have been there. Sometimes life really puts you through the ringer and all you can do is get supremely hammered and let it all out in a seedy karaoke bar, celebrity or not.