By: Sloane Hughes
I don ‘t know if it ‘s because we ‘re heading into a long weekend and my brain has already checked out or because I ‘ve been binging Mindhunter every single night until an ungodly hour because I have no self control (someone help me I can ‘t stop), but all day so far I have been exhausted. Like, skip the coffee, just crush a bunch of espresso beans and do a rail off my desk exhausted. That is, until I watched clips from last night ‘s VMA ‘s.
Okay, so here ‘s the thing, I ‘ve never been a big fan of awards shows. Not because I ‘m “too cool for them ‘ or anything dumb like that, I would just rather watch four straight hours of whatever show I ‘m into (Mindhunter, it ‘s Mindhunter) than watch an awards show.
But folks, I now know the error of my ways.
BECAUSE THE VMA ‘S RULED SO HARD.
Well, specifically ‘
MISSY ELLIOTT, LIZZO, AND NORMANI RULED SO HARD.
It goes without saying that Missy Elliott is one of the most iconic rap legends of all time, and not to brag (I ‘m gonna brag) but I saw her live at Pemberton Music Festival in 2015 and it was the best goddamn moment of my life ‘ and everyone else ‘s. It was nuts. I had tonsillitis during that festival and I swear she momentarily healed me during her set. She is so powerful.
We haven ‘t seen a studio album from the Lord our Saviour Missy Elliott since 2005, BUT SHE ‘S BACK Y ‘ALL. Her EP Iconology just dropped and breathed new life into me.
And then her VMA performance killed me again.
WHAT THE HELL. SHE IS NOT OF THIS EARTH.
To put it as concisely as possible, this was my initial reaction in real time:
I just watched missy elliott's vma performance and I am so fucking hype how am I just supposed to sit and work at a desk all day now what the fuck
‘ sloane (sipihkopiyesis) (@cottoncandaddy) August 27, 2019
Speaking of superhuman rap icons I would gladly pay to run me over with a car,
She also just blessed us mere mortals with new music, and her single “Tempo ‘ features none other than Missy Elliott, a collaboration which is now the most powerful force in the known universe, and her VMA performance proved without a doubt that she is and always will be 100% THAT BITCH.
Lizzo, if you ‘re reading this, please step on my neck
WHO EVEN NEEDS COFFEE TO FEEL ENERGIZED ANYMORE. NO CAFFEINE, ONLY MISSY ELLIOTT AND LIZZO.
They’re back and deader than ever. We’re all guilty of saying it, but these two girls take it to a whole new level.
Hi, guys, my YOUTUBE channel is back! For a second, I thought I was gonna lost it. I am so happy it came back to normal. To celebrate this moment, I made a compilation of my past videos. Thank you for being along with me! Let’s have fun!!!
Subscribe for more episodes! ? http://bit.ly/DosPadsSub Your favorite Snacks re-enact the 2014 Academy Award nominated Best Pictures