By: Funny Or Die

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Bobby Mooer Is The Dairy Champion That Milk Deserves

Mooooooooove over, world. There ‘s a new dairyman in town and he ‘s ready to set the record straight about milk. ‘

Sometimes, you know when something is your passion, your calling. The thing deep inside of you that lights the match that sparks joy every time you ‘re around it. For Bobby Mooer, that thing is milk. Milk is in his blood. ‘

In college, Bobby was torn between getting into the dairy business and going to law school. The stars aligned when he decided to split the difference and become a dairy lawyer. Bobby Mooer has been fighting for milk ever since. ‘

And the fight is ongoing. Due to the prevalence of the Internet, aka the World Wide Web, untrue rumors about the effects of milk have run rampant. Bobby plans to set the record straight. ‘

He ‘s spent the last several months gathering evidence to exonerate milk of all the myths and rumors against it. The report on his conclusions, the Mooer Report, will be released very soon. The milkman is coming, people.

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