Kitty Confessions: What They Don’t Want You to Know

Kitty Confessions: What They Don’t Want You to Know

CATS. Evil? Maybe. Trying to kill us? Most certainly. Misunderstood? Completely. We had a cat scientist decipher everything from ancient Egyptian kitten hieroglyphics to modern day messages in a bottle via hairball analysis. Below you’ll find the truth about what kitties are truly thinking and what they don’t want you to find out!

10 Childhood Games That Will Save Us During the Apocalypse

10 Childhood Games That Will Save Us During the Apocalypse

According to the Mayan calendar and Family Radio evangelist Harold Camping, the end of the world will begin on December 21, 2012. In case their predictions are true, here are some handy skills from childhood that may prove useful.

What ‘Home Alone’ Taught Me About Being a Grown Up

What ‘Home Alone’ Taught Me About Being a Grown Up

If watching ‘Home Alone’ has taught me anything, it’s that being a grown up is terrifying, and filled with predators. They seemingly lurk around every corner and try to squeeze through every dog door. And while this film is a romp through family-friendly adventure, it also imparts the basics of how to handle the real world/adulthood/not-fun-time.

9 Reasons Why We’ll All Go See ‘Titanic 3D’

9 Reasons Why We’ll All Go See ‘Titanic 3D’

Dear James Cameron, I get it. Your remake of ‘Fern Gully’ lost the Academy Award last year to your hot as fuck ex-wife. That’s a big blow to your ego, sure. And now, in some desperate attempt to remind us that you’re “cool” and “definitely a director” you’ve decided to re-release ‘Titanic’ in 3D… Granted, I will buy tix, because I’d like to reclaim some lost part of my youth, just like you! But the whole time I will be silently saying “Fuck you, Cam,” because this sucks. Just go make us Fern Gully 2, and stop re-releasing shit.

10 Pets Respond to Their Humiliating Halloween Costumes

10 Pets Respond to Their Humiliating Halloween Costumes

If you’re one of those people who dress their [insert mixed breed dog/cat/rabbit here] up on Halloween… good for you! Just know that while you’re laughing and laughing and laughing more still, you’re also slowly driving your [insert mixed breed dog/cat/rabbit here] to a place of utter contempt.

10 Ways To Avoid The 2012 Election

10 Ways To Avoid The 2012 Election

I’m not suggesting that you don’t go out and vote, that’s not what I’m saying here… Unless you hate politics, in which case, that’s EXACTLY what I’m saying. Either way, if Obama invites me to one more fake dinner party I’m going to drive into oncoming traffic.

‘Clueless’ Quotes That I Just Got

‘Clueless’ Quotes That I Just Got

This week marks the 16th anniversary of the release of the movie ‘Clueless.’ When it came out I was 10-years-old and my babysitter took me to see it because she thought I’d “Really like it.” Turns out, she was right! But that’s because I had a bucket of popcorn and a pack of gummi bears to shut me up. Now, let’s take a look back at some of the amazing jokes that my too young and too stupid self totally didn’t get.