Top 10 Ways to Stay Smooth
Embarrassing moments. They happen to some of us. Oh, who are we kidding? They happen to ?all? of us. Fortunately, we here at the Association of How To Behave Normally (in collaboration SNICKERS ‘) we have put together this handy guide for facing some of life ‘s most common awkward situations and knowing how to stay ?smooth?.
1. SITUATION: You accidentally like your crush ‘s Instagram post from 137 weeks ago. It happened so easily. You were doing some late night deep scrolling ‘ your fingers greasy from eating French fries ‘ and your thumb slipped. Now, thanks to your fry hands, your crush thinks you ‘re a creepy lurker. And to make things worse, it was a bathing suit pic. Truly the worst kind of pic to accidentally like. We feel bad for you. We really do.
SOLUTION: Get Smooth with Creamy Snickers.
2. SITUATION: You and your boss say goodbye to each other for the day and then turn and walk ?the same way? across the parking lot. Doesn ‘t she usually park in the other lot? But now she ‘s in ?your? lot? Are there no lot rules anymore? How are you expected to work some place where everyone just parks wherever they flippin ‘ please? It ‘s insane. Now you ‘re walking next to each other in silence. Would it be too weird to sprint the rest of the way? Yes.
SOLUTION: Get Smooth with Creamy Snickers.
3. SITUATION: You accidentally send a text, complaining about your roommate, to that same roommate. Listen, this guy is the worst. He never does the dishes, his room smells like a swamp, and he has a pet prairie dog that ‘s always getting loose. You were just wanting to vent to your best friend, whose name starts with the same three letters as your roommate ‘s name. You always knew you shouldn ‘t associate with multiple people whose names share several letters. Like a character from ancient Greece, your hubris has been your downfall.
SOLUTION: Get Smooth with Creamy Snickers.
4. SITUATION: You end a conference call by saying “I love you ‘ to your work colleagues. Hold on, there ‘s a simple explanation for this! You had just called your significant other. You were still in that “significant other ‘ frame of mind! Now you wish you could crawl through the phone line and pull those three measly words out. But you ‘re on your cell phone so there is no actual line. And also, even if there was a line, it ‘d be too small to crawl through. On top of that, you can ‘t actually “pull out ‘ words. Whatever, forget the line! Hey, maybe it ‘s just nice to tell your coworkers you love them. Is that soooooooo inappropriate? It is.
SOLUTION: Get Smooth with Creamy Snickers.
5. SITUATION: You accidentally call someone by the wrong name. You could ‘ve sworn this guy ‘s name was Clark, but it ‘s actually Connor. Hey, you knew it was something that started with a “C. ‘ Doesn ‘t that count for anything? Well, maybe it ‘s not so bad. You ‘ve only been neighbors for, what, ten years? Okay, that ‘s a lot of time. You ‘re never talking again.
SOLUTION: Get Smooth with Creamy Snickers.
6. SITUATION: While showing a friend a photo on your phone, you get a text from your mom asking if your rash has gone away. What are you doing, Mom?! Yes, it ‘s sweet of her to ask, but who texts about a rash? Now, it ‘s possible your friend didn ‘t read the text before you closed it. But they ‘re clearly giving you a look now. That “I know about your secret rash ‘ look. That look is very specific and recognizable! And if things weren ‘t bad enough, the rash has not gone away.
SOLUTION: Get Smooth with Creamy Snickers.
7. SITUATION: You mistakenly copy your whole office on an email about the plans for your friend ‘s “nasty bachelorette weekend. ‘ Everyone at your job is going to read that. Why, oh why, did you have to get so detailed about what “nasty ‘ means? You don ‘t even usually talk like that. You were just trying to impress the other bachelorette party attendees. And they aren ‘t even your friends. But now the folks in Human Resources are requesting you come in for a meeting.
SOLUTION: Get Smooth with Creamy Snickers.
8. SITUATION: You ask a woman when her baby is due and find out she isn ‘t pregnant. What?! No, no, no, no, no! You could ‘ve sworn someone told you Suzie was pregnant. Are you sure you ‘re not having a baby, Suzie? Yes, she ‘s sure and you ‘ve just made this so much worse. This is like a bad sitcom! Are you trapped in a sitcom now? Is this like the ?Truman Show? but with sitcom stuff? Let ‘s pray you are. If not, you ‘ll need to find a box to crawl in and hide for eternity.
SOLUTION: Get Smooth with Creamy Snickers.
9. SITUATION: In the middle of a staff meeting, you burp. It just came out of nowhere. Why did you drink ?three c? ans of sparkling water earlier? This burp was just an uncontrollable reflex. Plus, it wasn ‘t even that big a burp. Like imagine the smallest mouse possible and then that mouse burping. It was like that. But your CEO was right in the middle of reading some sales projections and it was very quiet in that room. So it felt like a dinosaur burped. The windows rattled.
SOLUTION: Get Smooth with Creamy Snickers.
10. ?SITUATION: You are asked to leave a movie theater because you were caught trying to smuggle in a full-size honey baked ham. Obviously, you were discovered when you dropped the ham in the lobby and accidentally kicked it ‘ sending it across the lobby floor and bouncing off the concession stand. And yes, this isn ‘t the most common embarrassing situation, but it ‘s happened to me, the writer of this list, at least four times. And I always feel bad and still hungry afterwards.
SOLUTION: Get Smooth with Creamy Snickers. ‘
